Lelouch and Schneizel's Dangerous Battles
by Windrises
Summary: Lelouch tries to prove that he's better than Prince Schneizel. However Schneizel knows how to make himself look good.


Note: Code Geass is owned by Sunrise.

Lelouch Lamperouge, also known as a superhero named Zero, felt that he was superior to his evil rival Prince Schneizel. Despite his confidence Schneizel and his sister, Princess Cornelia, had no respect for Lelouch. Lelouch had them come to his conference room for a meeting. Lelouch proudly said "I'm the greatest member of the family. Sadly you two think I'm a loser."

Schneizel replied "You're a chaotic fool."

Lelouch said "I've brought you here to prove how wrong you really are. I've been recording our recent rivalries." Lelouch got out a videotape and said "This tape proves how heroic and cool I've been and how evil and foolish the prince is. After you view the tape Cornelia will judge which of us is the better person."

Cornelia replied "I hope the tape isn't long."

Lelouch said "Schneizel and I have had dozens of fights. This tape has three examples of how magnificent I am." Schneizel and Cornelia rolled their eyes.

The tape started when Lelouch Lampeouge and Prince Schneizel both wanted more money for their future plans. Emperor Charles only wanted give his most successful child the money so Lelouch and Schneizel decided to have a baseball game. The rule is that the winner of the baseball game would get the money. Lelouch was the leader of a baseball team that also had C. C., Kaname Ohgi, and Jeremiah Gottwald and Prince Schneizel was the leader of a team that also had Princess Cornelia, Guilford, and Lloyd Asplund.

Lelouch felt determined to win the baseball game. He said "It's super important that we don't lose this baseball game. I need you to work hard and try to win."

C. C. sarcastically replied "Oh drat. I was going to try to do poorly and lose the game. Now I have to change my plans."

Lelouch sighed and said "Your sarcasm doesn't help me ever."

C. C. sarcastically replied "I'm sorry. I hate offending you boss."

Kaname Ohgi asked "Have you played baseball several times?"

Lelouch said "Of course I've done that. I played it constantly in middle school. I did extremely bad and got kicked off the team dozens of times."

Jeremiah Gottwald replied "Don't worry my prince. We'll win!"

Lelouch said "I haven't been a prince for years."

Jeremiah replied "What a honor."

Meanwhile Prince Schneizel was talking to his team. Schneizel said "Don't worry about winning. Have a nice and relaxing game."

Princess Cornelia asked "Don't you really want to win all of the money though?"

Schneizel said "I don't actually need that much money. I'm a rich prince. I agreed to this silly baseball game to troll Lelouch."

Guilford replied "That's good."

Lloyd said "I love trolling, but not as much as pudding."

Cornelia replied "Stay quiet Earl of Pudding."

A few minutes later the baseball game started. Lelouch danced to the starting area. He had a baseball bat and he thought that he would easily hit the baseball. Lelouch said "I'm going to hit it faster than any baseball player ever has." The crowd didn't believe Lelouch.

Schneizel said "I'm going to throw the baseball Lelouch. Since you don't the rules to anything I should tell you that you're supposed to hit the baseball with that bat."

Lelouch proudly said "I already knew that. I'm the best at playing games."

Schenizel replied "Yeah right. I've won every chess game we've played you ego filled liar." Schneizel threw the ball.

Lelouch proudly said "I'm going to hit the ball so fast." Instead of hitting the ball Lelouch accidentally threw his baseball bat into a crowd member's popcorn bag. The crowd member broke the baseball bat in half.

After Lelouch got a second baseball bat he said "I'm going to actually hit the baseball super fast this time." Lelouch accidentally hit the water boy. The water boy passed out and accidentally dropped several gallons of water at the crowd.

Lelouch got one last chance to hit the baseball. He said "I'm finally going to prove to these people how awesome I am at playing baseball." He tried to hit the baseball, but he got distracted by an ad for napkins. He stared at the ad for so long that he missed his chance to hit the baseball.

Lelouch was very upset that he did such a bad job. He said "I suck."

C. C. replied "You do suck at being careful, but you don't suck in general."

Lelouch smiled and said "I think that I would be a great general." C. C. rolled her eyes.

Jeremiah said "It's your turn to hit the baseball Mr. Ohgi. Don't let the boss down."

Kaname Ohgi replied "Well I'll try pretty hard to do a decent job."

Lelouch said "Um I guess that's a okay version of having the spirit."

Kaname Ohgi walked up to the starting area. Schneizel had very little doubt that Ohgi would do a pretty bad job at playing baseball. Schneizel said "Follow in Lelouch's legacy of poor baseball skills. It's a rather easy legacy to live up to."

Ohgi said "I played baseball last year so I know how to play it well." Schneizel threw the ball. Ohgi tried to hit the baseball, but he accidentally tripped to the ground.

Lelouch said "Ohgi's living up to my legacy, but that's not a good thing this time."

Schneizel threw the baseball again. This time Ohgi hit the baseball. Lelouch was surprised and happy. Ohgi tried to run to the next plate, but he got some sand in his shoes. Ohgi took off his shoes and started cleaning them. He said "There's enough sand in my shoes to make a sandwich."

Lloyd ran up to Ohgi and tagged him. Lloyd said "Tagging you gets you out of the game."

Ohgi replied "I failed."

Lloyd said "It's a honor if you you're a glass half empty type of person."

Lelouch was a little mad at Ohgi. Lelouch said "I trusted you like a son. I gave you a job."

Ohgi replied "Actually I'm older than you."

Lelouch said "Well you act younger than me."

C. C. replied "Yeah right. Do you know how immature you really are?"

Lelouch asked "Do you know how wrong you are when you claim I'm immature?" Lelouch started drinking a bottle of toilet water, eating a bag of dirt, and prancing around the field.

Jeremiah said "It's my turn to play baseball. I'll do a good job for you boss. I'll show my loyalty." Jeremiah ate a box of oranges and ran to the starting area.

Schneizel said "You look quite confident, but you really shouldn't be. Your teammates have done a terrible job at playing this game. I have complete confidence that you'll fail at this game."

Jeremiah replied "Your words lack the loyalty of mine. Prepare to be beaten you nasty prince." Schneizel threw the baseball. Instead of hitting it Jeremiah broke the baseball apart.

Shneizel said "That's a impressive way of failing to play the game accurately. Why did you do that?"

Jeremiah replied "Instead if a simple hit I went to the special way of taking care of things by destroying the baseball. My team deserves extra credit points for that."

Princess Cornelia said "For destroying the baseball you're banned from playing the rest of the game."

Jeremiah walked up to Lelouch and said "I'm truly sorry for failing you boss. I tried to get you extra credit, but my plan failed."

The next part of the tape showed the time Lelouch returned to the skateboarding place to have a skateboarding contest with Prince Schneizel. Lelouch said "I feel like I'm going to have the ultimate win today."

Schneizel replied "Greetings Lelouch." Lelouch stuck his tongue out at Lelouch.

Cornelia said "You lack maturity."

Lelouch replied "Maturity is overrated garbage. That's why I retired from having it."

Lelouch whispered "I need to make sure that I win the silly contest." Lelouch ran up to Schneizel's skateboard and started fiddling around with the wheels. Lelouch whispered "I messed up the wheels to stop Prince Schneizel from winning."

Schneizel replied "Please don't be near my skateboard Lelouch. You would accidentally break it if you were with it for too long."

Schneizel said "Lets start the skateboarding contest."

Lelouch replied "Okay. Skateboard first. If you do a more impressive skateboarding stunt you'll win."

Schneizel replied "Okay." Schneizel started skateboarding on the skateboarding area. The damage that Lelouch did to the skateboard's wheels stopped Schneizel's skateboarding jumps from being as high as he was planning. However he did manage to skateboard pretty high up. The crowd applauded.

Lelouch said "I'm going to show the evil prince and the silly crowd that I'm the best skateboarder in the world." Lelouch started skateboarding on the skateboarding area. He accidentally skateboarded off of the skateboarding area and crashed landed in the parking lot. He didn't get hurt, but he accidentally broke half of the cars in the parking lot.

Cornelia said "You did a terrific job Schneizel and Lelouch sucked."

Schneizel replied "Lelouch has to stop being a skateboarder."

Lelouch said "I'll do that." Lelouch broke his skateboard in half and threw it in the garbage bin.

The last adventure on the tape showed the time Zero had a garage sale. Prince Schneizel came by with a evil smile on his face. Zero asked "Why are you here?"

Prince Schneizel said "I heard so many good things about your sale that I decided to visit."

Zero replied "Well you better do more than visit. You better buy a lot of stuff."

Prince Schneizel saw the box that Zero brought by accident. The prince opened it and saw that it was filled with equipment that Zero and the Black Knights used to battle him. The prince said "I'll buy everything in this box."

Zero said "I never opened that box. What's in it?"

Prince Schneizel answered "A bunch of videos. These would be a great addition to Princess Cornelia's museum."

Zero said "I'll charge you five thousand dollars for the box." Prince Schneizel gave Zero the money and walked away with the box of equipment.

For the next few hours several customers came and bought lots of DVDs, used socks, broken toys, partially ripped comic books, and garbage bags. Zero got over fifty thousand dollars from the sale. He was so excited that he danced around. Zero said "I'm proud of you C. C. You made me sell stuff I thought that I needed, but I was wrong." Zero grabbed C. C. and danced with her. C. C. blushed.

Rakshata said "That's cute."

Diethard replied "C. C.'s cute, but Zero's a terrible dancer."

A few minutes later Prince Schneizel and his sidekicks started attacking the Black Knights' hideout using the equipment that the prince bought from Zero.

Zero said "This is dangerous. We better get ready to stop the prince."

Kaname Ohgi looked at the equipment and said "The prince is using our equipment."

Prince Schneizel said "Zero was foolish enough to accidentally sell a box of his equipment to me."

Zero angrily said "I thought you only packed my useless stuff in boxes C. C."

C. C. looked at the box and said "I didn't bring that box. You brought it on accident."

Zero said "Well you taught me to look at what's in boxes before I sell them."

Prince Schneizel destroyed the Black Knights' hideout. All of the Black Knights were outside so nobody got hurt. Prince Schneizel did a evil laugh while leaving.

After the tape ended Lelouch walked up to Cornelia and asked "Am I the better person?"

Cornelia said "Schneizel's like three thousand times better than you."

Lelouch replied "I failed to stop Schneizel again. However I plan on making tons of money by selling the tape." Lelouch kicked out Schneizel and Cornelia and went back to working on his videos.


End file.
